My name is Dixie. I am a 6 year old perpetual puppy. I pee and poop on the floor. I eat the cats food, even though Mommy buys me premium, locally made dog food. I tear up mattresses. I pee and poop under mommy’s loom in her studio. I eat the faces off toys. I steal the cats bed. I stole daddy’s turkey sandwich off the counter. I dig holes in the lawn. I rub in the marsh mud. I got sprayed by a skunk. I eat lip balm. I eat toothpaste, and I go through the garbage. I am a very naughty doggie.